When I learned I was going to be a father, I was scared. It did not matter that at 35, I was 14 years older than my mother was when she had me, or that I had always wanted to be a father. The fact remained, I had no clue what the role involved. At the time, I had two mentors. One, a single man who had recently adopted a newborn, the other, a married workaholic that struggled to balance his commitments to work and family.  At work, I  shared an office with three fathers. One was in his fifties when he and his wife adopted siblings who didn’t speak their language, another father was an active-duty officer in the military who spent months at a time away from his wife and three kids. The third was a father of three, the eldest of which was challenged with autism. 

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Listening to real stories of stumbles and successes showed me that while our paths to fatherhood differed wildly, as fathers, we had more in common than I would have expected. Their stories and advice encouraged and still encourages me to be “all in” as a father. Their tips have become the "tools" in my imaginary fathering toolbox. Some tools, I hope to never use, others, I employ daily. It is my hope that On Fathering can be a venue for fathers to share their tips and tools. I hope that by reading the stories of a diverse group of fathers, we can not only see how alike we are but more importantly, also add a tool or two to our own toolboxes along the way.